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In The Meadow

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In The Meadow Empty In The Meadow

Post  Fennec Tue Mar 20, 2012 8:51 pm

See... I think this is crap, but apparently it's good enough to get into the Scribble Scrabble Scribe magazine. It's a lyrics/poem kinda thing. And it's really morbid. I was going for a happy lullaby with a meadow in it.... It didn't turn out that way...

Pretty maiden, sitting in the meadow.
Picking wildflowers for her handsome fellow.
But little does she know,
He won't be there when she comes home.

In the dark of the night, a deal was made.
For the handsome fellow's death,
The pretty maiden's father paid.
And the boy was gone, the very next day.

The assassin buried his body, deep in the ground.
Then turned and headed back to the town.
But stopped when he heard a lovely humming sound.
And saw an angel picking flowers when he turned around.

Pretty maiden, picking flowers, in the meadow.
Suddenly engulfed by a large black shadow.
Then everything is quiet and still once more.

Pretty wildflowers, dripping with red.
And next to them the pretty maiden lay dead.
Standing over her, the assassin shakes his head.
And thinks, 'What have I done...'
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Post  raynebow2 Tue Mar 20, 2012 8:55 pm

Wow. That is AMAZING.
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Post  babydoll16508 Wed Mar 21, 2012 4:33 am

That's really good. You only don't like it cause you wrote it and writers never like what they write or feel fully done with anything that they write, though they can appreciate others' writing and style. Smile
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Post  raynebow2 Wed Mar 21, 2012 6:42 pm

That is true... I don't think any writer likes anything they've ever written.. Lol.
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Post  babydoll16508 Thu Mar 22, 2012 4:28 am

I'm in AP Lang and Comp at my school, and in AP Lang you study nonfiction author's rhetoric and style which is basically the study of the way an author uses language and the effect it has. My teacher had us read an essay, we read a book of essay written by famous authors, speakers, politicians and such, about an author telling his struggle to feel complete when writing,the process most authors go through in writing, and how an author is never really done and usually don't read there own work because they'll feel compelled to change something or other....The essay he wrote, he rewrote the essay many times before it was published the first time in a different book, before it was published in the book we read, he had edited it twice and added a whole other paragraph and he still didn't feel complete!
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Post  Fennec Thu Mar 22, 2012 4:48 am

NOT true. I think a lot of the stuff I write is awesome. Although... one of the only things I've tried writing is a novel I've been working on since like, sixth grade, so... >.<

Not a good example, lol

I posted a short story of mine on this website. And I posted it on another website. I got emails from people who read it that thought I should make a series! And I loved every last word of that short story. Wink
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Post  babydoll16508 Thu Mar 22, 2012 5:10 am

Haha, I didn't mean you're not going to feel accomplished....They feel accomplished, but always searching for another word...Hahaha, and it's good to like your work, I didn't mean that you weren't going to like some of it, just not all,even if people love it.
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